Thursday, November 11, 2010

The Juice is Loose!

Just in case you were wondering...... This style has already been done, and there is no need for you to try and replicate it. You will never look as cool as these guys do. Their wheels are so juicy, my car would have flooded if they had opened their doors. And, YES, you guessed it! This beauty had hydraulics like you have never seen before & beats coming from the trunk that would rattle your world! I would be nothing less than disappointed if the theme wasn't carried through to the inside of this totally tubular ride. I am thinking Rainbow Louis Vuitton seat covers, dice in the rear view, and of course some gold chains and diamond teeth in the glove box. I couldn't quite see inside without looking like I wanted to hop in the back seat with these brothers, although I am sure that they were the absolute picture of Southern Gentlemen. HA! Oh, sorry. Guess I couldn't help that. I wonder what kind of price would come up if you scanned that bar code? Oh wait, I bet I could use my food stamps on this one. Hmmmmmm...... What I do know is that one of these guys is gonna be ticked when he finds tire marks on his doo-rag that is shut in the passenger door. This is the perfect situation for me to use my "gangsta talk" because, "Dees bruddas, day be ridin' durdy an cleen all at da sayn time, Yo"!


Thursday, April 15, 2010

Burned in the Worst Way

This past Sunday I went to Gulf Shores with Allan's family. We hung out on the beach and at their condo. The baby absolutely loves the beach. Mostly because he thinks that he can eat the sand. He is also definitely not afraid to crawl right towards the incoming waves! I enjoyed watching him have so much fun, and enjoyed my time with Allan's Mom, Aunts, and Cousins.

On my way out of the house, I snagged some sunscreen from under the bathroom counter. SPF 30 to be exact. I knew that my poor, white appendages had not seen sunlight in about 2 years, so I wanted to be extra cautious. We got ready to go out on the beach at the condo, where I applied my sunscreen generously. Sure, the first squirt out of the bottle was crusty and squishy, and slightly discolored, but I didn't think anything of it. The beach was beautiful and it was perfect weather. I noticed about an hour after being on the beach, that my legs were getting a little hot and crunchy. So, I reapplied my sunscreen to the places that were getting the most sun.

Once we went in from the beach, I immediately realized how much sun that actually had been soaked into my semi-virgin-to-the-sun skin. All of the sudden my body temperature was around 250 degrees, and that was on the outside! Ahhhhh! The ride home was miserable. That night trying to sleep was miserable. The next morning, trying to get out of bed was miserable. I couldn't even walk. As I hobbled across the room, grabbing every piece of furniture on the way for support, Allan just laughed at me and asked, "What is wrong with you?" I told him that my legs were hurting so bad from my sunburn that I couldn't even walk. By this time my burn had turned purple. I didn't know that a sunburn could even come close to this horrible of a color. Allan was convinced that I must have hurt myself somehow, because a sunburn couldn't cause me that much pain on the inside. Well, he was wrong, even though he still won't admit it. I called into work because there was no way that I could show clients around the Hotels walking like a cripple, and on top of everything else the baby was very, very sick. (No worries, he did not even get pink in the sun.)

I began puking that day and continued to puke the next day. I must have gotten sun poisoning. I was determined to get up and go to work on Tuesday. I did my best to get ready without getting sick, which did not work out too well. I think I vomited like 5 times. I got in my car and got halfway to work on the Interstate, when all of the sudden, I felt the urge to vomit again! I immediately grabbed the Wal-Mart bag that my lunch was in, dumped it onto the floorboard, held it up to my mouth, and realized there was a hole in the bottom. A lot of good this was going to do me! I tried to hold the hole closed and use it as a barf bag and pull over all at the same time. I was not coordinated enough, and ended up with puke all over my work clothes. All that work getting ready for nothing. I do have to say that I contemplated, for a moment, if anyone at work would notice the stain or the smell. I must have been really out of it to even entertain the idea of still going to work. Once I got my head straight, I pulled back onto the Interstate and went home. Allan was surprised to see me back at home, but disgusted by me at the same time.

Anyways, I say all of this to teach you all a valuable lesson. Sunscreen expires!!!! I was unaware of this, and that is why I am still suffering to this day. My skin is still purple in places and I am peeling everywhere. I look like a freak and I am pretty sure that I will never get the feeling back in my right shin again. I will make sure from this point forward that we buy new sunscreen each Summer.

Thank goodness that I forgot Peyton's sunscreen at home from last summer. We had to stop on the way and buy some more for him. That would have been terrible! I would have felt like the World's Worst Mom.

Needless to say, after taking Monday and Tuesday off at work and coming back with a burn/tan, my co-workers and boss seem to think that I was lying about being sick. Oh well. They better just be glad I puked on myself and not them!

Friday, April 9, 2010

Peyton's First Easter


We had such a fun time this Easter with our families! I am so blessed to be close to my Parents, Allan's Parents, and lots of other close family members. It makes me so happy to know that all of our loved ones get to watch this amazing little boy grow up. He is getting so big, so fast. He will be 9 months on the 17th of this month. Wow, where has the time gone? Sometimes I look at him in awe and it brings me to tears to know that I could have never asked God for a more perfect thing to call my own. I pray every day that God helps me to raise my Son to pursue His Will every day of his life. I pray for the Woman that will one day complete him, that she may be a brilliant Woman of God. And I pray that Peyton will always know how much his Daddy and I love him so! These are my prayers for my little guy. I guess you can never pray too much. I love you my baby!

Monday, April 5, 2010

Church Billboards

Why is it that churches find the most ridiculous sayings to put on their billboards for everyone to see? I mean, do they think that these quotes are going to draw people through the doors come Sunday morning? I always make a point to read these signs on my way home each day and text my Sisters the craziest ones. Living in the "Bible Belt" gives me lots to choose from. My favorite one recently has been...

"C-H-_-_-C-H, What is missing? UR!" Oh my gosh, I Am.... I Am!? Well, I better get my butt in the pugh of Theodore Church of God this Sunday!

But, every now and then I run into a billboard that sends a pretty good message. This one recently really made me think....
"To Wink at Sin, is to Live in Sorrow" Wow! That is awesome. That is all that it takes, one little glimpse in sin's direction and your whole world could fall from underneath your feet. Reflect on that for a while!

I think on occasion, I get so caught up living life that I wake up some mornings and realize that I have been living selfishly. Satan makes it so easy to find excuses of why I don't have time to spend with God each day. But, there is no excuse big enough to keep me from slipping into Satan's grasp. We are only one "wink" away from being adulterers, drug addicts, alcoholics, etc. Daily Obedience to Christ and knowing that I am covered by the Blood, is what Saves me again and again, each and every day.

Friday, April 2, 2010

Too Much Booty in the Pants

First of all just let me say... "Oh my goodness!" A whole month went by and I didn't post even once. Sorry guys! Well, this one is an old story, but totally bloggable! I can't believe that I haven't told this one yet. Here we go.....

The day that we found out that Peyton was a boy was a very special day, in many ways! We wanted to share the news with family and friends and invited our Parents to come along with us. Well, this translated into my Mom, Allan's Mom and Dad, Allan's Brother, Allan's Grandparents, a video camera, and one cell phone that no one in that waiting room will ever forget. We were all sitting there waiting for my turn in the ultrasound room, when all of the sudden, at a terribly embarrassing volume we hear......

"Too much booty in the pants... Dance! too much booty in the pants... Dance, Dance, Dance, Dance! Wassup all the freaks out there with the big ole booties..."

Keep in mind that there are several other people, besides our family in the room. Including, Doctors, Nurses, and other families.

We all jumped about ten feet in the air and started looking around for the person that would have such an awful ring tone, at such a loud volume, in such a quiet waiting room.... and much to our surprise.... It was Allan's GRANDMOTHER'S phone!!!!! After that... it was all downhill... this is how the conversation went:

Allan: Geki (pronounced GEEKY - that's a whole other story), are you kidding me? Why is that your ring tone?
Geki: Eric (another Grandson) changed it to that song.
Allan: Here give it to me and I will change it to something NORMAL!
Geki: (snatching the phone back) NO! I like this ring tone. This way I know that it is MY phone that is ringing!
Allan: WHAT!? Do you even know what that is saying?
Geki: Yes! That I have too much booty in my pants.

WOW!!!! We all just sat in silence.

Monday, February 22, 2010

My 50th Birthday

I am so playing this game at my 50th! I know I am planning a little early, but I may not even remember my Birthday by the age of 50, much less this game!


Friday, February 5, 2010

Daddy's Little Boy




Just wanted you all to see my Redneck Baby! As long as I can talk Allan out of his camo and carharts, before he turns 5, I think we will be okay. He does look kind of cute for right now.

The Fight

What did married couples fight about in the olden days, before they could fight over which TV show they were going to watch? Last night Allan and I had a blowout! You would have thought one of us killed the other one's Mother. Let me paint the picture for you.... and of course you are gonna be on my side when this is all said and done with!
I got home from work, did a little straightening up, sat on the couch, and turned on American Idol. (My fave show, which I had DVRed)
About 5 minutes into my show, Allan gets home with the baby. I jump up to go get Peyton and play with him for a minute. I came back from changing his diaper, and much to my dismay, Allan had changed the channel to one of his dumb police shows. You know the really interesting shows where the cops are trying to find the murder for the ENTIRE show!
So, here is how the conversation went.....
E: Hey! I was watching American Idol
A: It was over
E: No it wasn't. I had just turned it on before you came home.
A: I know, and it was over
E: NO.... ITTTTTTT..... WASN'T!!!!!!
A: You already watched the whole thing
E: How would you know? You just got here. Why would I want to watch it, if I already saw it? Do you think I want to watch it twice?
A: It was over and you already saw it.
So, I am thinking in my head... is he serious... I mean, why would he think I was lying about watching a TV show!? This is the dumbest fight ever. But, keep it up buddy b/c I am GONNA win!
E: You have got to be kidding me! I only got to see like 5 minutes of it.
A: BULL!!
So... I did the only logical thing that a woman would do in this situation.... I slapped him and said....
E: Just turn the TV off then.
He pushed the 'off' button with all his might, threw the remote down, and said....
A: What the Hell is wrong with you!?
At this point, my best weapon is silence! But, I was thinking..... what just happened here, while kind of laughing in my head.
From that point forward, until Allan went to bed, everything that he did was in anger. He even fixed the baby a bottle by slamming things around in the kitchen for about 10 minutes. All the while, I am just calmly folding laundry in the living room. We haven't spoken since.